Hello, LiveJournal! I know I've been neglecting you quite a lot, but I feel you should be at least let in on this.

I WON THE GODDAMN NANO!!!


And now, I can die. =D

I think I finally have a plot for NaNo. Good thing, too, seeing as there are only nine days left.

I was originally going to write another Muse Bunny novel, but after all the trouble I went through with the last one (which I still haven't finished, btw), I changed my mind. That story is jinxed and so is everything related to it. Hell, even the forum is jinxed. >_> 

Anyway, I'm still trying to work in the finer details of this one, but basically it's going to be about this girl who's been locked in her room by her stepmother for about fifteen years, and told that the reason why she can't come out is because as a young girl she'd suffered from an illness which turned her face hideous to the point of being revolting, and she can't come out or people will start calling her a freak. She can't even see herself because her stepmum hid away all mirrors and any reflective objects. The girl's only companion is her tutor, who happens to be blind. But then one day her stepmum forgets to lock the door...

That's what I have so far, but the ideas of a circus and an "ugliest girl on Earth" and a nice ring leader are bouncing about in my head, so we'll see.

On another note, I may be getting a job soon. First month will be internship, and if I do well, I'll be kept as an employee. It's a cool sort of job, where I'm given films, documentaries, tv shows along with their scripts and asked to provide subtitles for them. They pay about 15 cents per each subtitle...so that means I can earn about $45 per 30 minutes of film. I think that's pretty good. And I can do it all from my house. I only have to go to the office one day a week to pick up my DVDs and scripts, and then I can email them everything. I really hope I get it. :3

I really REALLY do mean that.

Lately, when I open the site, I just regard everything with distate, check my PMs and log off. I can't stand to stick around for more than two minutes...and yet I find myself checking the site every five or ten minutes. There are many things I need to do around that damn place, but I can't bring myself to do any of it. Hell, the only reason why "Star's Secret Project" is under lock and key is because I'd known it would take me ages to finish it up, so I didn't want people pestering me about it.

And there are so many things I want to dooooooo.

I want to finish my NaNo novel.

I want to work on my children's novel.

I want to watch that adorable anime I downloaded.

I want to study for my English Literature exams.

I want to get my life in order because I don't like the way it's going right now.

I want to go out and see my friends because I haven't seen them in AGES.

But I can't. For some reason, TMB's just being an obstacle. >_> I hate it.

I was on my way home after a very lovely afternoon - I went out with a friend, had a yummy lunch and then went in to see Harry Potter. I hadn't seen this friend for a while, so it was nice to catch up with them. Anyway, the cab didn't quite drop me off in front of my place, so I had to walk a little. Part of my route involved a small sideroad filled with...eh, trash. Unfortunately for me, the road is narrow and cars happen to use it.

A fairly big car approaches and I'm forced to step sideways to avoid being run over. Only I step on a plastic bag and...whoops! I slip. Right in front of that car. >_> To my dismay, I was covered with something that suspiciously looked like it could be something other than mud. I kept my head low and practically ran back home.

Ironically enough, I had been talking to a friend earlier today about how I rarely embarrass or humiliate myself. Gambler's Fallacy, anyone? *mumbles*

I must admit, I love all the Marathon entries I've found on Friends Page today. They made me uber happy. XD I'm really pleased that everyone's having a great time with this. If all goes well, I may have two marathons a year (it's an annual sort of thing). Most participants seem really happy with it; their PMs are very happy-sounding. Hehe.

Anyway, I'm working on several other things on the site at the same time. New skin (black, red and grey colour scheme this time), my secret project, Muses' Realm, Wizards and Werewolves...it's taking up a lot of time. Incidentally, it's time I really don't have since I'm supposed to be packing up and boxing stuff. *sighs* 

We'll see how this month goes.

The Internet Fairy hath paid me a visit!!

That will be all for tonight.

Does anyone remember what I was working on during NaNo? The Muse Bunny novel? Well, you'd think I would've finished it by now, but noooo. It's still sitting there, tormenting me...and I can't seem to finish it! And you know why? Because it's possessed!!

No, I'm not being irrational. I'll prove it.

While writing this novel, I pulled several all-nighters, I neglected my apartment continuously and I’m ashamed to say it resembled Anna’s place at one time, I fell asleep while sitting for an exam and woke up writing, “And then Tinkerbell went to…” (I really don’t know where she went; maybe I would’ve known if I slept a little longer), I had Writer’s Block for nearly two whole months. I even mysteriously lost my Jump Drive where I had kept the full version of my story, and ended up having to rewrite about 8,000 words. Heck, even my computer started crashing repeatedly!

Coincidence? I don't think so.

Dammit! I can't believe I got sent an absence notification from my university! According to them, I've exceeded the 70 % of allowed absences, and I'll be automatically withdrawn from the course if I'm absent another time.

...

I protest! I was never fully absent! I'm extremely positive I attended the course more than 4 times! This is absolute bull! Just because I'm five minutes late doesn't mean I'm absent. I mean, excuse me, but I'm not going to climb 8 storeys just to get to your damn class. It's not my fault the elevators are usually crowded and I have to wait more than ten minutes at times to get my turn. This is seriously unfair. I'm going to go talk to this teacher about this. *mumbles*

*le sigh* These past two weeks have been exceptionally stressful.

Not only did my prick of an uncle come for a ten-day visit, but my mum's uncle died and mum came over and I had a truckload of exams and...gah. But now mid-terms are over, and I'm starting to breath again, so it's all good. It was lovely seeing mum, even if it were just for a few days; you never realize how much you miss people until you see them again. My bloody uncle's gone, which is a relief. Mum talked to him about me while he was here, and I heard him say that his opinion of me is that I'm a rotten egg. Charming, isn't he? -_-

If only I would get my connection back, then things would be peachy, but...NOTHING! They aren't even calling me! And whenever I call, they tell me they're having technical difficulties. Grrrrr. I think I may have to postpone the Writing Marathon if I don't get my connection by Friday.

That is all.

I was watching "Awake" with my friend today, and I was thinking, "Oh, God, thank goodness I didn't watch this thing before I had my surgery."

Seriously, imagine being cut up while you're still awake. *shudders* I'm grateful to be such a heavy sleeper. XD

Maybe I should stop being so nice and...accepting.

Yesterday I called the Internet people and they told me I will have to wait another 10 days. I said okay...but now I'm thinking I should've chewed the employee's head off and threatened her with her job or something.

And I've got this translation project this week and everyone should've sent me their translated parts at 3 p.m. today, but many of them didn't. They told me it's going to take them a little longer and I said it's alright if they did. I should've given them a definite no, but I didn't! *mumbles* Now I've got a lot of work to do. *sighs* 

I hate this month. I hate it.

Well, I still don't have any Internet and I keep being reduced to go to the Internet cafe, and that is not making me happy at all.

What adds to my unhappiness is that TMB seems to have died while I was away. Seriously, I look at it now and it's depressing. People aren't as active as they used to be and many of the senior members seem to be disappearing. It's disheartening, to say the least. I don't know what to do anymore. I keep trying to come up with things to keep it interesting for members, but they just continue to DISAPPEAR. *grumbles* 

One more thing to rant about...Tara's and Illy's letters haven't arrived yet. T-T 



P.S. I sent out mail to Lizzie, Tara and Ileana three days ago. If all goes well, it should arrive in another 11 days.

Okay, it's been nearly ten days now...I can hold up for another 15 days, right? Right?!

*sighs heavily*

I canceled my Internet subscription before I left to my parents' house. When I got back from that visit, I subscribed with a new ISP. They told me it will take at least another three weeks to finally get me connected.

*wails* 

I can't take it anymore! I feel cut off from the rest of the world! And it doesn't help that I've got loads of homework and research papers. I can't keep going to the Internet Cafe whenever I want something - it's too costly! T-T

This should teach me not to cancel a subscription before getting another one.


P.S. (to Lizzie) : I'd like your address, please! Could you PM it to me on MB? :3

*yawns* 

It's 7:15 a.m. and I'm already up because my brother was crying...and because I should be going out with a friend in less than two hours. I'm sooooo sleepy, though. >_> But, to pass time, here's a little meme!

( Meme! )

Lately, I've been obsessing about a few issues on TMB. Since I can't eat any chocolate this week, I think I'm using TMB as a means of distraction.

Anyway, here's the thing: we've been getting a lot of members, but many of them just register and never come back. Some sign the rules, make an introductory thread, post a couple of stories and then disappear altogether. Yesterday I deleted about 40 accounts for people with zero posts who haven't been online since October. >_> It's seriously sad.

So it got me thinking: really, what makes a new member stay on TMB? Once they register and everything, do they stop and say, "Okay, I've registered. Now what?" I took a look around and realized that most people stay for the community, but seriously, what does a new member who knows no-one on the site do? It takes them a while to fit in and most people aren't willing to put in that effort.

Basically, I want something that will encourage new members to stay, and give the old members new things to do. I was talking with Zeph last night and here are a few ideas:

1. A Buddy System: we open a new sub-board in the Newbies Corner, where the old members can sign up to be "Buddies". When a new member registers, one of the signed-up members will offer to be their Buddy, and will get to know them and introduce them to people and show them around the place. This way, the newbie will be able to develop friendships and will become a part of the community more quickly.

2. Newbie Chat: a thread where the newbies can come and chat, regardless of whether they created an introductory thread or not. They can ask questions, old members can come and greet them and offer them help, etc.

3. A Guest Book: to avoid the problem of people registering and then never coming back, we can create a place where they can come and ask questions about the board before they register. This way they  can make sure that TMB will give them what they want before they create an account and abandon it altogether.

4. A Debate Section: I've noticed that a lot of members on TMB love a good debate, so why not create a sub-board somewhere dedicated solely for debates? Maybe a Debate Club? 

5. A Writing Competition which involves the whole site: I don't know how to go about this, but I want something where people have to hunt around for clues around the site in order to write a story.

That's what I have in mind so far. Any ideas or opinions are EXTREMELY welcome!

This has been the roughest week I've had in such a long while. I have cried and cussed more than I've done my entire life...and I have been ill to the extent of not being able to get up from bed for two days in a row.

My uncle from my earlier entry has been...a bastard. A complete and utter one. It was 12 30 a.m. and I was working on a research paper and I was far from done. There were some chores to be done and he told me to get up and do them. I said sorry, but I can't; I've got work to do. So he starts saying that I'm always on the laptop and I never do any work, and I tell him that I'm a university student, and I've skipped a few days so I've got a LOT to do, but he doesn't understand and it gradually progresses to yelling and he almost hits me. I was furious. Next day I find that he stole my router. He fucking stole my router. MINE. I find it and take it back, so then he steals my adapter. I buy a new one. I'm barely online and I have a hell lot of work on the computer. Mum tells me to reconcile (not apologize) and I decide to do that just for her sake. What happens?

"I don't want to talk. I have a headache and don't need it worsened."

Bastard. He's gone now so I'm done with him. I'm just glad I did my part of the deal, so I'm utterly blameless.

Then there's my aunt's husband...who's basically an uncle as well. My problem with him goes back a couple of months, when he came knocking at my door because he needed to go to the loo and my place was the closest around. It just so happens that I was in the bathroom myself when he came so I couldn't have possibly opened the door for him. He takes it personally and just...stops talking to me. A couple of weeks later he's admitted into the hospital for some illness, and I get my surgery about the same time. Never mind all that...he's back home and today I go to visit him and I bring this really lovely bouquet of white and pink tulips just as simple gesture of good will. He mocks it and I ignore him. But then about an hour later we're all in the living room and I've just dozed off a little, when I wake up they're talking about me and I hear my aunt saying, "Give her a break." So then he starts calling me a liar and that he knows I was lying about being in the bathroom and just didn't want to let him in and that I should apologize to him and...well, I'm a liar to him until I take some sort of oath. I was so mad and I just got up and stormed out screaming at him. I was shaking and crying all the way home.

No one, and I mean no one has ever called me a liar. They all know I'm honest and that I've got a very guilty consience which basically stops me from lying. I'm not a liar...it really hurt me.

But what really breaks my heart is that these people are ones I've known and loved my whole life, and then they turn out to be like this...it really stuns me.

And all that without mentioning that this has been my final week in the Fall semester so I had a lot of exams and term papers to hand in. I was literally swamped.

I need a break.